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Mom goes to son’s room to wake him up.

Mother replies, “Because you’re the PRINCIPAL!”

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One woman was bragging to her next-door neighbor
about her son, a college student at the University of Illinois.

“Our son is so brilliant, every time we get a letter from
him we have to go to the dictionary.”

“You’re lucky,” the neighbor said. “Every time we get a
letter from our son in college, we have to go to the bank!”

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip.

After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for
the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes
wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.

‘”Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

‘”I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes,” replies Watson.

‘”And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute.

‘”Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions
of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically,
I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, I deduce that
the time is approximately a quarter past three.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful
day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all
powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part
of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes is silent for a moment…

“Watson, you fool!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”

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